Mr. and Mrs. James: 2013

I thought I'd write down the birth story of my little Bambino before all memories are a COMPLETE blur...

So, 13 days ago, I looked like this.

40+ Weeks

I was 40+ weeks pregnant - waiting for my little Bambino to arrive. Truth be told, I was in no rush to have the Bambino. I figured if he was happy inside my belly - I'd let him chill in there for as long as he wanted. Besides, babies are WAY easier to take care of inside the belly than outside.

Then, on May 2nd at 2:30am - I woke up to CONTRACTIONS that were 6-7 minutes apart (Contractions are terrible, by the way. Ladies, before ya'lls get yourselves pregnant - ask me about the NITTY GRITTY truth about pregnancy. I'll let you know what to REALLY expect when you're expecting. You'll be terrified into abstinence, just like the good Lord wants).

Anyhoo - I woke up Mr. James about 3:30 to let him know... "We're having a baby TODAY!" In our bleariness, we were off to Salt Lake Regional at 4:30am.

Labor Vision

When we arrived - I wasn't nearly dialated or "contracting" enough to really merit staying (which is a terrible, terrible thing to hear. Contractions are terrible. No one wants to be sent home in the midst of them). The nurse told us to go walk around for an hour - hopefully to help encourage labor to be more... labor-y. (Walk it off, walk it off).

So, walking around an hour in Salt Lake Regional Medical Center... which was really spooky. There is NO ONE in that hospital. I'm pretty sure it's the locale for the next "American Horror Story."

Sleepy Bob.

After an hour, I only dialated 1/2 centimeter more - making it a grand total of 2.5 centimeters dialated (out of 10). So, they called my doctor to see if I should be sent home (Please, no). Since I was past due - they opted to... INDUCE ME!

Now, I was petrified of Pitocin. However, I was MORE terrified of going home in the midst of contractions. So, I opted for Pitocin, Epidural, GIMME EVERYTHING!!!

I'll be honest, the rest of the day is kind of BLURRRRR... I was SOOOOO out of it. I couldn't really tell you much - except that I was fully dialated by 2:00pm - but they wanted to wait for my doctor to arrive at 4:00 before we tried delivery.

By the way - they also don't let you eat anything - which I thought was bogus until I started throwing up - and I COULDN'T SIT UP BY MYSELF. That was probably the most startling moment of the day. The epidural completely numbs you - and I couldn't sit up. I had to call to Bobby for help on sitting up - before I asphyxiated on my own vomit - Jon Bonham style.

At 4:00pm, the nurse came in and said we should try a "Practice Push" before the doctor arrived. She told me she was going to count to 10 - and while she was counting, I should start pushing.

Here's how the countdown went, "One... Two... Three... Stop! Stop! Stop!"

Apparently, I did such an excellent job - I almost delivered the Bambino on a "Practice Push."

The doctor arrived at 4:07pm, she got all "scrubbed up." With the doctor there, we started the delivery at 4:09pm and five minutes later - I had the cutest lil' Bambino in my arms.